Monday, January 2, 2012

Memory Monday #2

Here's another look into my diary.  I've learned a lot about myself in the last couple of days through reading my old journals.  One thing that was confirmed through this one was that my guilty conscience was almost as good as any discipline I could have received!  When I know I am guilty, I can be pretty hard on myself.

april 16th, 1991 (9 years old)
Dear Diary,
I am a stupid idiet
who can even
have a good aditude
towds enny thing.

Today at girl scouts
we were trying to plane a pic knack
and I mess every
thing up.  Now my mom
hates me and it will
be very hard to earn back her respect for me.
stupid dumb itityit

Wowza!  I'm sure I was being pretty bratty and controlling.  That's one thing that being an only child can do to you.  My mom was our girl scout leader so that always made me feel like I had more control over our troop than I did.  I bet everyone else wanted to do one thing, and I threw some kind of fit because it all played out differently in my mind.  My mom probably didn't know what to do with me and I bet it ended up in a yelling fight between her and I after the meeting.  Then probably in her crying because she had such a bratty daughter and didn't know what to do with her.  Then me feeling guilty and sending myself to my room.  I don't remember ever really getting disciplined at all but I remember whenever I felt guilty (which was almost every time I made my mom cry, which was a lot) I would send myself to my room.
Also - I love that I was trying with all my might to figure out how to spell "idiot".  My spelling really hasn't improved, thank goodness for spell check and the word suggestions that pop up for  me now!


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